There are some days when I just want to sit down and cry. I worked so hard to get myself on the right track, and then everything just took over. My schedule, being away from home, money (or lack thereof), and my insurance.. All these things made it practically impossible to stay on that right track because they’ve denied me that tiny bit of extra help that I had: my medication. Now I’ve come to the conclusion that it was that little extra help which made a difference in the first place. I don’t particularly want to be dependant on medicine, but when the same exact lifestyle off the of medicine yields no results compared to the results attained from said lifstyle on the medicine, I have to conclude that the medicine was helping.
(Warning: Potential TMI Ahead)
November 2007 marked month 8 of me not having my period, so finally at the insistence of Michael, I went to the doctor. I hadn’t wanted to go previously, because my opinion was that rather than worrying about my health, everyone (including my family) would just assume I was pregnant (and of course most of them did). But I wasn’t pregnant (since how can you be pregnant when you’re not having sex?) so there really was something wrong with me. Three weeks, five blood tests, and a liver ultrasound later, I had my diagnoses: Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS) / Insulin Resistance (IR) and Non-Alcoholic Steatohepatitus (NASH).
While nothing medication-wise can be done about the Steatohepatitus, I could take medicine for the Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. After speaking with the campus doctor (the one administering the tests) I found out that while I was insulin resistant, it hadn’t escalated yet to a level where I could be considered a Type 2 diabetic. She talked with me about how, if I could change my lifestyle and start losing weight, I may never have to deal with the cysts that come with PCOS (and so far I’ve been extremely lucky and haven’t) and that the IR and NASH would actually probably get better.
I was determined to get better, so I went on the medication (Metformin) without hesitation. Those were the worst three weeks of my life. I was weak, tired, and threw up at least once a day. My doctor told me that if by Week 4 there wasn’t any improvement, then we’d either have to make an adjustment to the medication or dosage. But thankfully everything cleared up and I was 100% back to normal by the end of that week. She had given me a 4 month presription for the medication (since she wanted me to see specialist instead of just a GP), which carried me to about midway through April of 2008. During that time, I ate much better, and managed to drop nearly 20 pounds. I also got my period back, even though it was still not regular.
I usually get my period at the end of the month, but April went, May came and went, and June came and went without me having a period. I had bene trying to get into a specialist, but every one at school had a wait time that ended when I’d be home, and every one at home had a wait time ending when I’d be back in school. In July of 2008, I headed in to see an OBGYN who did more blood tests and finally an ultrasound of my uterus/ovaries. The results came back that I did indeed have Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, but instead of prescribing the medicine, the OBGYN seconded my original doctor’s opinion that I should see a specialist to make sure that I didn’t really have diabetes.
Now, I am at my breaking point. I’ve been off the medication since last April, and have managed to gain that 20 pounds back plus another 10. I haven’t changed the way that I eat and such from when I was on the medication, and I still exercise as often as I am able to. But nothing is making any difference. I’m heading home tonight for my mother’s birthday, and we’re going to talk about my options. Because at this time, the only specialist down at school that will accept my insurance (or else I just can’t afford to go to the doctor) isn’t accepting any new patients. I’m going to call into my OBGYN office and hopefully get an appointment so that I can explain to her what’s been going on and that I just cannot get into a specialist. Maybe then I can get back on the medication that was actually helping me.
Like I said – I don’t want to seem dependant on medication, but if my illnesses won’t get any better unless I lose weight, and I can’t lose weight without being on the medication or simply starving myself to death, then I’m not sure what my other options are.
I see people like Dez and Chrissy who are actually losing weight, and taking the steps they need to in order to better themselves and they’re an inspiration. Because now is not the time to sit back and go with the flow. I’m sick, and now is the time to fight.
I didn’t really start losing weight (I kept losing the same five pounds over and over once I was down to 236lbs) until I started taking Cinnamon tablets with my Metformin and Vitex.
I wish you the best of luck.
Don’t give up the fight. It’s hard and takes a long time to figure out what works for your body. Are you on birth control? For many of us that helps a lot! And, you can usually get that for free or very cheap. Make yourself a priority and get into to see whatever doctor you can. You don’t have to necessarily see a specialist now. It has taken me 1.5 yrs to lose 51 lbs and I have another 34-40 to go. I did it without metformin but it was incredibly difficult. For years I had the same issues you do. My cousin and I both struggle. Check out our blog and be sure to get support from those around you. I don’t care if it’s a “female” problem. People need to understand what’s going on. Good luck!
You’re not dependent on the medication to lose weight, you’re dependant on the medication so that your body cab process insulin like a normal body would, so your pancreas doesn’t work double/triple time and give out. That’s it. When your body doesn’t use insulin the way it should, it’s hard to lose weight. Very, very hard.
I’ve been trying healthy eating and exercise for years, and I’ve gotten pretty good results, but like my doctor said, I’m never going to be able to reach my goals if my body cannot metabolize food like it should. I’m not able physically able to lose weight like a normal, non-PCOS/insulin resistant person can.
I was lucky enough to still lose weight while not on medication, but most women aren’t that fortunate. I was put on metformin mostly for the insulin resistance (as the PCOS itself wasn’t causing me any huge problems) because with my family history of diabetes, he wants to prevent that for as long as possible.
If you need the pills, you need them. Don’t feel bad about it.
I wish you all the luck in the world in your road to healthiness, and I’ve got my fingers crossed for you. I hope your doctors are able to help right now while you’re trying to find a specialist. I’m sorry you’re having such a hard time with everything. 
If you ever need to talk, I’m online a lot, and I’d be happy to be there for you. 
Also… *shakes an angry fist at metformin and its side effects of doom*
That sucks. I hope you can get back on the medication soon, so that you can get back on track with things. Good luck.